


Scopaesthesia

by derwentian



Category: Half-Life
Genre: Gen, [benrey voice] tommy knows, in which i take tommy's line about Seeing Faster and run with it, rated T for canon-compliant foul language
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-05
Updated: 2020-06-05
Packaged: 2021-03-04 04:02:34
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,584
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24557368
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/derwentian/pseuds/derwentian
Summary: The psychic staring effect (sometimes called scopaesthesia) is a supposed phenomenon in which humans detect being stared at by extrasensory means. [...] Brain imaging has shown that the brain cells which are activated when a test subject can see that they are being stared at are distinct from the cells activated when the starer's eyes are averted away from the subject by just a few degrees[citation needed].
Relationships: Tommy Coolatta & Gordon Freeman
Comments: 6
Kudos: 116





	Scopaesthesia

Tommy picks up on a lot of things that others don’t. That’s the advantage of seeing faster, and it’s ostensibly the reason why he keeps watch when the science team decides to stop for the night. It’s true that he would notice an incoming peeper puppy or vonnegut much faster than anyone else—and every second counts in combat situations—but the real reason he always volunteers for lookout duty is to keep an eye on a more immediate problem.

Benrey does things when nobody’s looking. Or at least, when he thinks nobody’s looking. Or maybe he knows Tommy sees, and he just doesn’t care. Tommy hasn’t figured out how it works yet, but every so often Benrey will do something impossible, or just nefarious, and nobody seems to notice but him. Gordon comments sometimes, but he’s usually just confused—he doesn’t  _ see _ what’s happening. Benrey’s obviously up to something, and if he has an evil plan, it would be easiest to spring it at night when everyone’s asleep and defenseless. 

So Tommy takes the night watch, and he watches. To make sure Benrey  _ doesn’t _ do anything. This time, they’ve taken shelter in a nondescript-but-large room that previously contained a squad of soldiers; now that the soldiers are gone, the science team has helped themselves to their setup. Most of it was useless to them aside from some scavenged ammo, but the room is probably the safest spot they’ll find tonight. Only one doorway, which Tommy sits and watches with his legs folded underneath him and his hands in his lap. (On the first night he’d sat at the ready for hours with a white-knuckle grip on his gun, but nothing had happened and it wasn’t worth his fingers hurting the next day.)

They’ve only been here for about half an hour—just long enough for the rest of the team to fall asleep, judging by the sounds of their breathing—when Benrey shifts from where he’d laid down when they agreed to stay here overnight. He’s hardly audible, just the faintest rustling of fabric and the scuff of boots on the floor, but Tommy’s good at noticing things, and he cranes his neck a bit to see what happens next. 

Benrey stands very quietly with a strange smoothness to his joints that makes Tommy momentarily imagine him as a snake, or maybe a piece of laminated paper. He’s trying to avoid making noise, that much is obvious. Probably doesn’t want to be noticed, but it’s too late for that. For a moment Tommy thinks he’s going to try and tiptoe around the science team’s bodies sprawled on the floor, but then Benrey freezes abruptly like a burglar who’s just heard a light turn on upstairs. His body is completely still as he turns his head ever so slowly to face Tommy. The brim of his helmet throws a long shadow over his face, but his eyes seem to glow—backlit like a cat’s in the dark.

The room is painfully silent aside from three slow rhythms of breath—Tommy’s is frozen by the tension, and he’s not entirely sure Benrey breathes at all. Benrey’s posture is tense and rigid, like he’s prepared for a conflict but daring Tommy to make the first move. For an agonizing moment that feels like eternity, they just stare at each other. Dimly, Tommy regrets not having his gun out already, though it wouldn’t help him if Benrey did decide to attack.

Then Benrey blinks, and he’s gone—even with Tommy’s faster sight, there’s just displaced air where he used to be—and suddenly he’s inches from Tommy’s face—close enough to know for sure that Benrey definitely does not breathe. Tommy jerks away with a startled noise that he just barely has time to be embarrassed about before he loses his balance and falls over backwards, smacking the back of his head against the floor. By the time he’s scrambled back to a seated position, Benrey is nowhere to be seen, though he still gets the distinct feeling that he’s being laughed at.

Tommy also gets the distinct feeling that he’s being  _ watched _ , but that turns out to just be Gordon staring at him groggily from the floor. Oops. “Hi, Mr. Freeman,” he attempts to whisper, then immediately grimaces when it definitely does not come out as a whisper.

“Hi, Tommy.” Gordon doesn’t bother being quiet as he pulls himself upright, narrowly avoiding tripping on Bubby’s legs as he closes the distance between them. “What was that about?”

Oh, great, he heard that. “Well, Benrey, he—” What  _ did  _ Benrey do? What can Tommy say that won’t sound absolutely insane? “Benrey got up, and—and he snuck over and startled me.” Close enough. That’s pretty much what happened.

Gordon snorts disdainfully. “Yeah, that sounds like Benrey. Guy’s a fucking child.” 

That isn’t quite the word Tommy would use. ‘Monster’, maybe. “Sorry I woke you, Mr. Freeman.”

“It’s fine, I wasn’t really asleep yet. These floors aren’t too comfy, if you know what I mean.” With that, he takes a seat next to Tommy, wincing as his knees pop with the movement. “Don’t worry too much about Benrey. He’s a dick, but he’s probably just pissed that you caught him sneaking off to go eat rats in the vents or something.”

Judging by Gordon’s tone, that was probably meant to be a joke, but Tommy wouldn’t put it past Benrey. Still, he can’t help feeling like something more sinister is afoot. He fidgets with the sleeves of his lab coat for a few moments before speaking again. “Mr. Freeman? I don’t—I don’t like Benrey.”

Gordon snorts again, though this time with humor. “Yeah, me neither, buddy.”

“No, I mean—” he finds himself struggling for words to describe a concept he can’t quite catch in his hands. Something’s not  _ right _ with Benrey, something’s  _ wrong _ about him—“He scares me, Mr. Freeman. I think he does it on purpose.” Maybe Benrey’s trying to keep him quiet about what he’s seen. Or maybe he just likes picking on him.

Something about Gordon’s expression hardens; maybe his brow furrows, or maybe he clenches his jaw. Tommy was never good at reading that kind of thing. “So he’s giving you shit, huh? Being a dickhead when we’re not around to call him out?” Something like that, though that’s not at all what Tommy meant. Gordon takes Tommy’s lack of response as its own answer. “Sorry, bud. We’re kind of stuck with him for now, but we’ll beat his ass when we get out of here, if you want.”

Somehow, Tommy gets the feeling that Gordon is more right than he realizes. The thought fades before he can make sense of it, though, so he leaves it alone. “I don’t think that’s a good idea, Mr. Freeman.” He needs to be more direct about this. “I think Benrey’s—”

Before he can say more, Benrey strolls through the doorway as if summoned by his name. He isn’t moving in the strangely fluid way he was earlier, and he might even be breathing; a perfectly normal security guard, if you didn’t know any better. Tommy  _ does _ know better, though, and the difference in Benrey’s bearing unnerves him more than if nothing had changed. “Aw, man, you guys are having gossip time without me? Not cool. You’re so mean.”

“We weren’t  _ gossiping _ ,” Gordon snaps back, instantly taking the bait. “We were talking about how you’re being a dick to Tommy for no reason, aside from the fact that you’re an asshole.” Idly, Tommy wonders if Benrey makes people angry on purpose so they’re too distracted to notice the things he does. “Look, I get why you hate  _ me— _ I mean, I don’t, the passport thing’s fucking stupid—but what do you have against Tommy? He never did anything to you!”

Benrey shrugs, distinctly unmoved. “It was just a prank, man. Not my fault little baby man can’t take a joke.” He locks eyes with Tommy again, somehow managing to look threatening  _ and _ bored simultaneously. “Kinda cringe, bro.”

“God. Why are you like this.” Gordon throws his head back and looks skyward like he’s searching the heavens for answers. “You’re the most infuriating person I’ve ever met in my life.”

While Gordon’s looking away, the expression on Benrey’s face changes—it might be called a sneer, if one was feeling generous and didn’t understand the way human faces are supposed to move—and for a split second, Tommy feels that same wave of confusion and fear from just a few minutes ago. Then it’s gone, and Benrey flops back down on the floor with the others like nothing ever happened.

Now the conversation’s over whether they like it or not. Gordon sighs loudly, dragging his hands down his face. “Jesus Christ, I can’t stand that guy. Look, Tommy, I can take watch if you want—” he’s interrupted by a massive yawn.

“No, Mr. Freeman, it’s okay. You’re too tired. Wikipedia says most adults need six to seven hours of sleep a night.” Gordon raises an eyebrow like he wants to point out that Tommy isn’t getting any sleep at all, but he yawns again before he can get the words out. “I’ll keep an eye out for monsters.” He can’t help glancing at Benrey as he says it. Benrey’s facing away from both of them now, but Tommy can’t shake the feeling that he’s watching them—watching Tommy specifically—nonetheless. This is going to be a long night.

**Author's Note:**

> tommy: benrey is a monster and i feel unsafe  
> gordon, missing the point: is this ableist disturbing you, king
> 
> there's a dearth of both tommy-centric content and evil benrey content, so here we are. comments and feedback are appreciated!


End file.
